Such a Bad Influence: The Hidden Dangers of Toxic Friendships

Living life surrounded by positive and supportive people does not only improve one's attitude and outlook in life but also benefits one's overall well-being. People with healthy connections are more likely to be engaged, be happy, and recover fast from any illness. On the other hand, unhealthy, toxic relationships can be just as damaging.

Research proves that having toxic people around can negatively impact one's life. According to a study published in the journal Psychiatry Research, people who frequently interact with toxic individuals are 3 times more likely to experience mental health problems, 2 times more likely to have relationship problems, and 1.5 times more likely to engage in unhealthy behaviors like substance abuse. A separate study conducted by the University of California, Berkeley, found that merely spending 10 minutes with a toxic person can increase levels of the stress hormone cortisol by up to 25%.

Who Is a Toxic Friend?

Toxic friends can come in all shapes and sizes. They can be the friend who is always negative and pessimistic, or the friend who is constantly gossiping and spreading rumors. They can also be the friend who is always trying to one-up you or make you feel bad about yourself.
Characteristics of Toxic Friendships

• They are jealous of you. Toxic friends may feel threatened by your success or happiness and try to sabotage you or make you feel bad about yourself.
• They are manipulative. Toxic friends may use guilt, flattery, or other tactics to get you to do what they want.
• They are always negative. Toxic friends may always find something to complain about and may try to drag you down with them.
• They are not supportive. Toxic friends may not be there for you when you need them and may even make fun of you or belittle your problems.
• They are always trying to one-up you. Toxic friends may always try to make themselves look better than you and may try to put you down.
• They make you feel bad about yourself. Toxic friends may make you feel guilty, ashamed, or worthless.

How Do I Deal With a Toxic Friend?

If you find yourself dealing with a toxic friend, there are a few things you can do:

1. Talk to your friend.

Let your friend know how their behavior is affecting you. Be honest and direct, but try to be respectful. If your friend is willing to listen and change their behavior, great. If not, you may need to take the next step.

2. Limit your contact.

If talking to your friend doesn't work, you may need to limit your contact with them. This could mean spending less time with them, avoiding phone calls or texts, or unfollowing them on social media.

3. End the friendship.

If all else fails, you may need to end the friendship. This can be a difficult decision, but it may be necessary for your own well-being.

"Friendships should be mutually beneficial. If you have a friend who constantly puts you down, makes you feel bad about yourself, or tries to control you, it's time to re-evaluate the friendship," says Dr. Robin Buckley, a clinical psychologist and author of the book Bad Friends: The Art of Toxic Friendships.

How Do I Find Healthy Friends?

The best way to avoid toxic friendships is to surround yourself with healthy, supportive people. Here are a few tips:

1. Look for positive people.

Surround yourself with people who are positive, optimistic, and supportive. These are the people who will be there for you when you need them and who will make you feel good about yourself.

2. Be yourself.

Be yourself, and don't try to be someone you're not. The right people will like you for who you are, not for who you pretend to be.

3. Join a group or activity.

Join a group or activity that you're interested in. This is a great way to meet new people who share your interests.

4. Volunteer.

Volunteering is a great way to meet new people and make a difference in your community.

5. Take a class.

Take a class on something you're interested in. This is a great way to meet new people who share your interests.

6. Join a social club.

Join a social club or organization that aligns with your interests. This is a great way to meet new people who share your interests.

7. Use social media.

Use social media to connect with friends and family, and to meet new people.

8. Meet people through a friend.

Ask your friends if they know anyone who might be a good friend for you.

9. Be patient.

Finding healthy friends takes time. Don't get discouraged if you don't find the perfect friend right away. Just keep putting yourself out there, and you will eventually meet people who are good for you.

Common Mistakes to Avoid

When trying to meet new friends, it's important to avoid making common mistakes, such as:

1. Trying too hard.

Don't try too hard to make friends. Be yourself, and the right people will come to you.

2. Being judgmental.

Don't be judgmental of other people. Everyone has their own unique qualities.

3. Being negative.

Nobody likes to be around negative people. Be positive and upbeat, and people will be drawn to you.

4. Not being yourself.

Don't try to be someone you're not. People can tell when you're being fake.

5. Not taking risks.

Don't be afraid to take risks. Join a new group or activity, or ask someone you don't know to go out for coffee.

Tips and Tricks

Here are a few tips and tricks for finding and keeping healthy friends:

1. Be a good friend yourself.

The best way to make friends is to be a good friend yourself. Be kind, supportive, and understanding.

2. Be yourself.

Be yourself, and don't try to be someone you're not. People can tell when you're being fake.

3. Listen to others.

Take the time to listen to what others have to say. Show them that you care about what they think and feel.

4. Be positive.

Be positive and upbeat, and people will be drawn to you.

5. Be forgiving.

Everyone makes mistakes. Be forgiving of others, and they will be more likely to forgive you.

6. Be supportive.

Be supportive of your friends, and they will be supportive of you.

7. Be honest.

Be honest with your friends, and they will be honest with you.

8. Be respectful.

Be respectful of your friends, and they will be respectful of you.

Conclusion

Toxic friendships are bad for your physical, mental, and emotional health. It is important to recognize the signs of toxic friendships and take steps to protect yourself from their negative effects. If you find yourself struggling with toxic friendships, don't be afraid to seek help from a friend, family member, or therapist.